I think the video speaks for itself.

Stuff you may not know about us. We do birthday parties for kids. We do birthday parties for kids. We do birthday parties for kids. Sorry about the stutter there. Just trying to pop up more in Google. :-)

Seriously. We have had several so far and they have been tremendously successful. Above and beyond the fantastic food and fabulous entertainment, the biggest selling point seems to be that the parents get to spend time with their little one instead of at home in the kitchen alternately burning and under-cooking frozen appetizers from Costco.

We do everything. Just tell us what time you want the food out and then enjoy your party.

Did I mention we do birthday parties for kids?
So Alanna, our EMPLOYEE (I love saying that!) started last weekend. The first time she had to make a hot drink with whipped cream, I was there, ready and waiting with the camera. Davina explained about some of the pressure issues and suggested she give it a try in the sink before firing it at a cup of searing hot liquid. Then Davina stood back.
I, of course, stood a very safe distance away with a camera with a zoom on it. Next think you know.....


She just did it. Just like that. Nothing happened.


I guess it's just me and Davina.

So where did we leave off? We had discovered that the missing piece of the canister was actually in the canister. Meh. That should have been the end of it. Ya right. See below.
Why? Dear God Why?

We replaced the missing piece! It was fine! Just in case you're not sure what you're looking at, you're looking at Davina filling a whole frakking milk frother thingy with whipping cream 'cause the frakking thing wouldn't stop spewing everywhere!  Breathe.

Back to the drawing board. What the hell is the matter with this thing?


So Davina took it apart. And this is what she found. See that wee plastic washer type thing? It's busted. That's why the damned thing splooges all over the place. So we went next door to look at a replacement piece. The guy in the kitchen store had, of course, never seen this happen to this piece in 30 years. Also, the piece would be $12. We tried to look up the manufacturer directly but they are in Taiwan and don't have a properly accessible website. So we deemed the solution to be.......

... buying a whole new canister plus ordering the new part for the old one. Soon we will have two. Yay!

Davina went into the back - again. Made whipped cream - again. Filled the canister - again. Reappeared eager to show me how well it worked and how much control she had over it.

So naturally she sprayed it all over me. My legs, the floor and right through the air vents in my shoes. Nice.

God willing that ends the saga of the whipped cream.

Wine in hand and child sleeping, I finally feel able to attempt to describe the events of this evening.

I have to start by asking if you ever have one of those days where you laugh so hard and uncontrollably that tears are streaming down your face and you can't stop? That was me and Davina an hour ago in the car.

Tonight we had a speaking engagement. Ya, you heard right. People wanted to hear us talk about the cafe, our experiences getting this far, etc.... It was at George Brown and was to their class of entrepreneurs.

It was through George Brown that we were able to do our business plan and get our money from the CYBF in the first place. We're their success story, so they asked us to come in and give a talk. I think they may have outlined what we were supposed to talk about, but of course, we didn't have time to prepare or anything. And, of course, we had the kids with us.

So we squeeze 5 dozen apples, 4 dozen eggs, 3 kids, 2 adults, 1 stroller and a partridge in a pear tree into Davina's car and head to George Brown. We explain the need for good behaviour to the children. We arrive.

The five of us are led into a room with about a dozen young would-be entrepreneurs who are full of questions and we answer them and generally explain how we go about doing things. The kids eat granola out of take out coffee cups on the floor.

Then the kids start getting restless. Then they start making noise. Someone attempts to occupy them with Sponge Bob videos on a computer. We attempt to appear professional and answer questions intelligently while being constantly distracted by the voices of our children in the way that only the voice of your own child can distract you. At some point Avon wanders over to Davina and gives her his dirty diaper that he's just taken off. Nice.

Questions answered and students seemingly impressed we decide the kids aren't going to last 5 more minutes and it's time to go. There is granola ALL OVER THE FLOOR. We apologize profusely. We tell the kids we're leaving and Kai and Jazzy bolt from the room. Kai rounds the corner (to where a class is being lectured to) and jumps up and down, cup of granola in hand. Granola all over ANOTHER FLOOR. Jazzy bolts through a door and sets off the fire alarm. We are all apologies and then we get the hell out of dodge.

We get back to the car to discover that Davina diligently locked the doors but left the drivers side door actually AJAR. The locks don't do much when the frakkin' door is open.

In the car, it is a cacophony of "Mommy! Mommy!" "I'm hungry!" "Can I have some more cereal" "Croissant!" "Where's my juice box?" "I want water!" "Where are we going?" "I want that!" "No! I want that!"

Davina and I can't even hear each other. Jazzy comes through the loudest with her tremendous upset that Davina threw away her empty cup of cereal. She really really wanted that cup. Her displeasure overtook the car. Davina tried to console her, but dammit, she wanted that cup. Finally, Kai who is sitting beside Jazzy, mere inches from her (wait for the relevance), usurps her hold on the conversation by asking for a croissant. I hand him the one Avon insisted I take back from him (after demanding it in the first place). Kai, taking the croissant now needs to free up his hands. "Here mommy take this". A FRAKKIN' EMPTY CUP. I just looked at Davina she at me. I painstakingly pass the cup from Kai to Jazzy, who finally stopped whining about her missing cup!

That was it. The straw. You know the one. The last one. Laughter, tears and the need for booze right now. Speaking of booze right now...... I'm off to stare at the TV and drink.

See you in the morning.